Beware of Angry People

We had a neighbor that by all appearances had what most people would consider "it made". I don't really know what he looked like because he never took the time to introduce himself or acknowledge my greetings the rare times we would cross paths. He hated our dog, he hated our other neighbor, he hated our across the canal neighbor as well as the neighbor on his other side...even the sweet elderly woman across the street. He hated noisy leaf blowers to the point of wanting to have the home owners association put a restriction on them, realizing most neighbors have a regular lawn crew with commercial grade equipment. He would call and complain to my landlord 2500 miles away every time a dog would bark claiming our dog barked constantly. If the neighbors had a party he would crank up his home system all the way, usually Sinatra, as if the offending neighbors could even hear it over the racket they were making with us being in the middle of the cacophony.

Our landlords were friends with a guy known around town as "box man" because he always carries a box on the handlebars of his bicycle and that is his only mode of transportation. He some how talked my landlords into letting him stay in their upstairs while he waits for his settlement from being hit on his bicycle. He is a LOUD person, suffers from PTSD and screams sometimes at night, doesn't have an inside voice and his television was louder than my 98 year old mother's t.v. He is an angry person also. His brother stole his inheritance and blah, blah, blah. Everyone is out to get him and he makes everyone know he has every right to be on the road and will scream and swear at any body he remotely thinks is disrespecting him. The angry neighbor was of course less than thrilled at having the local, homeless looking, shirtless bike riding, Winn-Dixie dumster diving weirdo living next door.

The superbowl was on and box man had the sliding doors all opened like everyone in the Keys does that time of year so it wasn't long until the angry neighbor started making his usual passive aggressive stereo blasting gesture but box man remained blissfully ignorant of the neighbor. Box man gets a phone call and gets really wound up and LOUD talking with his buddy. The angry neighbor is a drinker and now he is liquored up and he commences to yell at box man to shut up, shut the fuck up, SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU SO AND SO... Box man is now arguing with his friend on the phone as his brain seems to integrate the two voices and the guy on the phone gets frustrated and hangs up leaving box man to realize it was the angry neighbor and not his friend on the phone cussing at him. They subsequently go at each other like two little boys on the playground,' I know you are but what am I?" My wife had to tell these grown, supposed adult men to cease and desist in no uncertain terms. The absurdity of it all.

In the end, the angry neighbor was so, Whats the word?, Angry, yes so angry he sold his house and moved somewhere else where I'm sure he is a brown spot in the community. Guess he showed us! Box man was told to leave and a deputy insured a smooth transition and box man is still cruising US1 with no shirt and a mostly empty banana box from the dumpster behind the Winn-Dixie screaming at every car at every intersection making sure they know his rights. Meanwhile we have a new neighbor that has a fine puppy dog and crew and says "hello' in the morning. Life on planet earth as my buddy Brent would say. Peace and Love!